[fragment]

[After a long day at the end of a long week with lots of things to do – but successful, even enjoyable, if a bit pressured: a student's year abroad rescued, two postgrads off in different research directions, supervision and personal analysis, analysands energetic but entangled, an HIV patients' meeting with a long list of things to do, that turns into a cheerful party, perhaps the biggest social group we've had in a year –

I dream, with increasing confusion and anxiety, a fairy tale with four parts: but the second is somehow an irregular continuation of the first – it doesn’t fit, seems partial or asymmetrical – and after all four parts, I can’t figure out where it is going or how to understand it. I go through it again, trying to see if I’ve missed something, but it seems unresolvable, as though something is missing, has been told wrong, has happened in an incomplete way.

I wake in a sweat, as though a sudden ‘night sweat’, something I haven’t had for months, at least – mild but noticeable, a bit uncomfortable; though not enough to soak the sheets.

I’ve missed medications four or five times in the past month…]